Shots, Shots and More Shots!
by Birdytwofer
Summary: Because a drinking contest between three rivals could never go wrong. NaLu, GaLe, and Gruvia hints.


_For /R/FairyTail's fanfiction contest._

 **Shots, Shots, and More Shots!**

"Hmmm," Natsu mumbled out, brow creasing as he squinted at the single, small posting on the mission board. "Only one job posted right now."

"What is it?" Happy chimed, hovering next to the Dragon Slayer.

"Required: Two strong wizards to act as an escort/bodyguard for my daughter while she travels from Oshibana to Shirotsume through Mt. Hakobe. Reward: 300,000 Jewel…" Natsu read monotonously. "That's weird, why only two people?"

"We should do it Natsu, we need food money," Happy exclaimed with a slight whine, his stomach growling as if on command. "I miss the good quality fish."

"Yeah, yeah, we'll do it. It sounds like fun! If we're lucky, we'll get to do some fighting!" Natsu exclaimed excitedly, briefly punching the air before turning and shouting across the guild hall. "Hey! Lucy! Wanna go on a job tomorrow?"

"Huh?" The blonde in question murmured out in response, breaking away from her conversation with Levy to stare at the dragon slayer, who simply grinned and pointed at the job flyer. At this, Lucy's eyes immediately lit up and she jumped from her seat, knees bumping the table and nearly knocking Levy's book out of her hands. "Really?! There's a new job posting?!" A look of relief washed over her face. "Finally. I was worried I wouldn't make rent this month…"

"Yeah, 300,000 jewel too!" Natsu exclaimed as Lucy approached him at the mission board. "Split between the two of us that's 150,000 jewel each! That's enough for your rent right?"

"150,000 jewel?!" Her eyes widened as she stared at him with a bewildered expression, glinting with a mixture of greed and thankfulness. "I could pay two months' worth with that!"

"Hey, Natsu," Happy tugged on the strands of his partner's scarf in effort to get his attention. "What about my share? And don't we have three people now?"

"Aw, Happy, don't worry buddy, you can have some of my portion," Natsu smiled reassuringly at his feline friend. "Most jobs aren't gonna count you as a person anyways, so we still got just two people."

At this Happy floated down to the ground as if shot with an arrow, expression downcast. "I'm never considered as part of the count for the group," he sulked.

Lucy laughed awkwardly and smiled at the crestfallen exceed. "Aww, I consider you a member of the group Happy! You can have some of my portion, too."

"Alright, so it's settled then!" Natsu pumped his fists in excitement. "We go to-"

"Who says you get first dibs on the first job posting?" The cool voice of Gray interrupted from behind him, causing Natsu brows to immediately tense up in a scowl. "I've been waiting for days now for a new posting. Mira said the next one would go to me."

"What are you talkin' about stripper?!" Natsu growled, marching up to the ice-make mage and glaring daggers at him. "I saw it first!"

"And I had first dibs, flamebrain," Gray responded heatedly.

"You liar! Besides, that job requires two people. Who you gonna go with? Erza and Wendy are out on their own mission."

"I'll take Lucy," Gray simply shrugged, looking towards the blonde who shrunk away in response, not wanting to be dragged into their argument.

"Um..." Lucy began, suddenly feeling far more awkward both due to being unwittingly dragged into their scuffle, and due to the fact that she had just spotted Juvia glaring daggers at her from behind the nearby wooden beam, her eyes glinting with such a furious jealousy that practically screamed 'love rival!' _Great_. "I-"

"Why would Lucy wanna go on a job with an annoying pervert like _you_?" Natsu interrupted, scowling fiercely at the ice mage.

"Better than an overly destructive flamebrain like _you_!" Gray retorted.

"Here they go!" Happy chimed from the sidelines.

"Ice princess!"

"Squinty eyes!"

"Slanty eyes!"

"Hey hey," Lucy began somewhat meekly, holding her hands out in a vain attempt to calm the situation. "You know, you guys could just go together… I don't need to go, really, I'll figure out how to pay my rent some other way."

"With him?! _No!_ " They vehemently retorted in unison.

"Juvia will go with you Gray-sama!" The water mage approached them, clinging to Gray's arm and flirtatiouslly rubbing her chest against him all the while shooting glaring looks of jealousy at Lucy, who shrank away in response.

Gray's eyes twitched slight discomfort as he awkwardly attempted to inch away from the clingy female. "Um, ergh… no thanks…"

"Great," the satisfied, gruff voice of Gajeel came from behind them, and before they could react he reached over them and ripped the job posting off the board. "This job is mine then."

"Hey!" Natsu and Gray once again spoke in unison, with Gray tearing away from Juvia's grasp.

"What's the big idea?!" Natsu growled, grabbing the hem of Gajeel's shirt and preventing him from walking away. "I was here first!"

At first Gajeel glared daggers at the pinkette, but his mouth quickly curved into a smirk. "Geehee, you shoulda' been quicker then. It's mine now," he spoke, tauntingly waving the piece of paper in front of him.

Natsu's brows creased into a thoroughly annoyed glare as the gusts of air created by the waving paper wafted over his face and his grip on Gajeel's shirt tightened, causing the iron dragon slayer to return his glare. "You wanna go? I'll fight you right here!" Natsu aggressively challenged, flames materializing around his unoccupied fist.

"Oh you're on," Gajeel responded with equal aggression, tightly gripping Natsu's wrist and digging his nails into the flesh. "I'll beat ya into the ground!"

"Hey! Why is this just between you guys?!" Gray interjected, positioning himself in fighting stance and suddenly topless, the surrounding air becoming considerably colder as his ice magic began to brim around him. "I got first dibs on that job anyways, it's mine."

"Whatever!" Natsu growled loudly at him, flames fully engulfing his body. "I'll take you both on! I'm all fired up now!"

"No. Fighting." The trio immediately halted at the baritone and booming voice of Laxus, who was casually seated at the bar and staring at them with stoic disinterest. "I ain't gonna be the one who has to answer to Gramps when he comes back and sees the guild hall destroyed."

"But-" Natsu began, but was immediately cut off.

"Stop. Now. Solve it some other way. I don't care how as long as it doesn't involve destroying shit," and with that, Laxus returned to ignoring the group, casually taking a sip of his drink as the three loyal members of his team buzzed around him.

The three males continued to glare daggers at each other, but opted to listen to their master's grandson and ceased their fighting. Natsu let out a frustrated noise akin to a growl and released his hold on Gajeel, shoving the thoroughly annoyed iron dragon slayer away from him and dissipating his flames. Gray followed suit, sighing heavily and straightening his posture, halting the spell he had been in the process of casting.

"Well, guess this is mine then," Gajeel shrugged casually, a triumphant smirk plastered firmly on his face as he began to walk away with job flyer in hand.

"Hey! You can't have that!" Natsu and Gray both shouted in unison, jumping and glaring at each other once they realized they had spoken at the same time. "You can't have it either!" They both growled at each other, butting foreheads.

"This is a mess…" Lucy sighed on the sidelines. She really just wanted a way to pay her rent…

"Aye," Happy chimed in agreement.

"Gajeel!" Levy suddenly exclaimed, running up to the iron dragon slayer and grasping onto his arm, tiny fingers firmly curling around his bicep and encouraging him to come to a halt, hard eyes staring down at her. "That's rude! You shouldn't just take things from people!"

For a moment, Gajeel looked thoroughly conflicted, eye twitching in frustration and perhaps even the smallest hint of a blush gracing his cheeks. He huffed, tearing his gaze away from the solid script mage. "Not my fault they were too slow," he spoke indifferently.

Gajeel once again began to walk away, but Natsu and Gray were immediately on his tail, buzzing around him, shouting threats and attempting to snatch the flyer out of his hand.

"Perhaps there is another way we can solve this?" The soft voice of Mirajane interjected and the three males halted and stared at her inquisitively, prompting her to tilt her head and sport a kind yet slightly mischievous smile. "How about a friendly competition? One that won't make master angry by destroying the guild hall. The winner is the one I'll allow to take the job with a partner of their choice."

"The hell? I already have it though!" Gajeel exclaimed angrily, showing her the now-crinkled paper that was quickly becoming even more crushed in his fist.

"Hmm, nope!" Mirajane concluded after a few seconds of pondering. "I won't set up the job for you unless you win fair and square in this competition."

"Tch," Gajeel huffed and rolled his eyes, reluctantly dropping the crushed job posting into Mirajane's outstretched hand.

"Sounds like fun!" Natsu exclaimed, pumping his fists. "I'm gonna win! What are we doing?"

"Well," Mirajane began, thoughtfully placing her finger on her chin. "Cana suggested a drinking competition."

"Damn right I did!" Cana called over from the bar, taking a swig of beer and promptly burping afterwards.

"Drinking contest?" Natsu and Gray both inquired, promptly glaring at each other when they realized that had spoken in unison again.

"Yup!" Mirajane chimed, grinning at them. "You'll all take shots together, and the last one standing wins. If you give up, or pass out, then it's an automatic loss."

"That all? Sounds easy," Gajeel spoke with confidence, a wry grin gracing his features. "I'll never lose to these losers."

"Yeah right!" Natsu challenged, grinning determinedly at his fellow dragon slayer. "You're going down!"

"Bring it on," Gray remarked coolly, lips curling into a confident smirk.

….

"I can't believe they're doing this," Lucy exclaimed with a sigh, scratching her head as she attempted to work a knot out of her hair while watching the trio of males that were currently lined up at the bar.

"Go Natsu!" Happy excitedly cheered from beside Lucy, who simply groaned.

"Okay!" Mirajane chimed from behind the bar. "First round, how about we start off with some fire whiskey shots? I'm sure Natsu will love these!"

With that, Mirajane slid three small, metal shot glasses across the bar and in front of each participant. The dark liquid inside swirled around and mingled with the side of the glass, and the drink was topped by a fairly impressive flickering, greenish-orange flame.

"This is already easy!" Natsu exclaimed, promptly inhaling the fire and quickly swallowing the foreign, dark liquid, coughing slightly after he did so. "Man, that stuff is bitter." He remarked, scrunching his face in mild disgust.

"Geehee, whimp," Gajeel commented before tossing the entire glass into his mouth and chomping down on it, extinguishing the flames with his mouth and promptly chewing on the metal.

Gray simply smirked at the two males in silence, casually blowing the fire out on his drink and swallowing the liquid underneath it in one large gulp.

"My Gray-sama is so cool!" Juvia gushed from the sidelines, her face thoroughly flushed in admiration as she intently watched the object of her affection.

"Nicely done," Mirajane commented, smiling sweetly at the group. "Let's move onto the next round then."

….

 _Later_

"Look at them! They're all lightweights! Pathetic!" A slightly tipsy Cana exclaimed with a roar of laughter, slapping her knee to accentuate the point.

It was nearly an hour in, and Natsu, Gray, and Gajeel had all taken at least fifteen shots by now. The contest had attracted some attention, with multiple members of the guild buzzing around and cheering on the contestants.

"This is ridiculous," Lucy remarked, unsure of what to think of the three now-thoroughly drunk males. She'd _never_ seen any of them drink this heavily before, not even Natsu.

Levy, who was seated beside her laughed lightly at this. "You've said that at least five times now Lu-chan. They're just being guys."

"I know! It's just weird, it's like they're different people now." _Way different._

"Hey, Levy!" Gajeel shouted from the bar, slamming his recently downed shot glass onto the table and grinning widely at the bluenette. Way too friendly for Gajeel. It was weird. "Git' over here and cheer me on!"

"M-me?" Levy flushed furiously at this, unused to seeing the object of her affection act so amicably towards her.

"Yeah shrimp! C'mere!" Gajeel encouraged, a sound almost akin to a giggle escaping his mouth.

Levy moved towards him and the moment she was within arm's reach, Gajeel snaked his arm around her waist and pulled her into him, her smaller body colliding with his larger muscled one. A brief look of shock washed over the solid script mage's face and then she promptly blushed to the color of a tomato.

"Um, Gajeel…" Levy began, hesitantly looking up at the iron dragon slayer, who simply grinned down at her and patted her head with his free hand in response.

"I can't lose now that I got her with me!" He announced with confidence to the room, still sporting a wide grin. "I'm gonna win, and then we're gonna go on this mission together!"

Jet and Droy looked as though they might faint from the shock of seeing the object of their affection so easily whisked away by another man.

"You still think you're going to win? Come on, be realistic," Gray spoke coolly, seemingly unaffected by the effects of the alcohol except for one small thing: He was allowing Juvia to sit on his lap, and quite willingly too.

"Gray-sama will win!" Juvia exclaimed with defiance towards her ex-Phantom Lord guildmate, softly stroking the ice mage's unclothed chest as she did so. "Then we will go on the job together, just the two of us!" She spoke dreamily.

"Of course," Gray grinned at her, sliding a single arm around her shoulder, causing a stunned look to momentarily pass over her face before she relaxed into his embrace. She looked like she was in heaven.

"Gray-sama!" She gushed, nuzzling into him and massaging his chest.

Lucy frowned at them from the sidelines. This was weird. Really weird. She was well aware of the effects that alcohol and how they 'enhanced' personalities, but she wasn't expecting anything quite like this. Her frown slowly turned into a wry grin - at least it was entertaining.

"Hey, Luuuucy," Lucy jumped and fixed her eyes on Natsu, who was no longer seated at the table with the rest but rather standing right in front of her, his speech slurred and eyes dizzied, a light flush tinting his cheeks. "Aren't you gonna-" a hiccup, "-gonna cheer me on?"

"Natsu go sit back down!" Lucy ordered as the highly inebriated fire mage neared closer to her, his stance wobbly. "You're drunk, you're going to-" She nearly fell over when Natsu stumbled towards her, briefly losing his balance and toppling into her. "Natsu!"

He laughed at this, grasping onto her shoulders and resting his head in the crook of her neck, his hot breath wafting over her skin. Lucy's nose scrunched in mild disgust as the stench of alcohol freely entered her nostrils. "You smell nice Lucy," he slurred out, inhaling her scent and causing Lucy to immediately flush to a color akin to Erza's hair.

"Don't sniff me!" The celestial spirit mage exclaimed in mild shock, backing away from him. However the motion only caused the inebriated male to slide down her chest, his lips accidentally ghosting over her skin as he did so which caused the female to go rigid.

"Mmm, I could sleep here!" He spoke tiredly as he boldly rested his head on the two large mounds on the blonde's chest, his cheeks flushed. "These are so sof-"

The sound of skin coming in contact with skin rang throughout the guild hall, causing everyone to momentarily stop what they were doing and look towards the duo. Natsu stumbled backwards and fell to the ground, immediately bringing up a hand to rub his stinging cheek as he looked up at Lucy with an expression that reminded her briefly of a kicked puppy. "That was mean," he mumbled out.

"You deserved it," Lucy resolved, defiantly crossing her arms over her chest. She did feel _kind of_ bad for hitting him, but he was crossing some lines there.

"But-" Natsu halted what he was about to say and groaned, his cheeks puffing up slightly. "Ugh, I don't feel so goo-" He stopped and gurgled, and as if on cue, immediately ran towards the nearest trash can, stumbling into it and clutching the edges as he began to empty his stomach contents into the bag.

"Oh dear…" Mirajane said as she watched Natsu slouch over the trash can.

"Too much to handle flamebrain?" Gray taunted, casually stroking Juvia's hair as she continued to lean into him, her face akin to one of pure bliss.

Natsu didn't even bother to respond as he continued to get sick. Lucy approached him, softly rubbing his back as she often did when he got motion sickness. "Hey, you'll be fine. You just drank too much." She comforted.

"Ugggh," Natsu groaned out, face paled and clammy. He attempted to stand up, wobbling and stumbling in place for a moment before his eyes rolled into the back of his head and he fell backwards, landing on the wooden floor with an audible 'thump' and blacking out.

"Natsu!" Happy zoomed over to his partner's side, landing next to Lucy who stood over him, a puzzled and slightly annoyed look gracing her face as she seemed unsure of what to do.

Gajeel bellowed out in laughter at the scene. "Geehee! What a lightweight!"

"Natsu's out!" Cana exclaimed, thrusting her half-empty mug up into the air causing some of the contents to slosh out onto the table.

"Just Gray and Gajeel left now!" Mirajane announced, sliding two more shots in front of the remaining duo. "Time for another round!"

"Alright! Watch this!" Gajeel exclaimed with a wide, cocky grin, promptly grabbing the shot and downing the contents.

Gray followed suit, reaching around Juvia -who was still all too happily sitting on his lap- grabbing the glass and quickly drinking the liquid inside, a confident smirk gracing his features.

Another round.

And one more.

By this time, Lucy had managed to drag the passed out Natsu to one of the benches in the hall and was now proceeding to draw on his face with permanent marker while Happy cheered her on. A delightfully evil smirk was plastered on her face as she connected the two of his eyebrows into a unibrow, snickering all the while. Such was the punishment of passing out when drinking.

The two remaining contestants took yet another shot, making their total eighteen now.

"Give it up Popsicle, you'll never… you'll never… ugh," A look of dizziness washed over Gajeel's face, vision blanking and his body wobbling. He clutched onto the table edges as he gradually sunk lower, eventually toppling off of the stool and onto the ground.

"Gajeel!" Levy exclaimed as the iron dragon slayer nearly fell into her, nearly knocking her down to the ground with him. She immediately kneeled down next to him, poking his cheek. "Are you okay?" He began to snore lightly in response.

"Looks like Gajeel's out," Mirajane announced, and the few remaining onlookers cheered. "That means Gray wins!"

"I knew it," Gray grinned, urging Juvia to get off of his lap as he stood up and stumbling slightly as he did so.

"Careful my dear!" Juvia exclaimed in concern, grasping onto his arm in effort to help him maintain balance.

"Thanks," Gray slurred out, flashing her a confident grin and leaning into her slightly, causing the water mage's blush to deepen. He looked to Mirajane. "I'll be back for my job tomorrow," he turned and winked at her before casually swinging an arm over Juvia's shoulders. "Let's go to my place and celebrate," he suggested to the water mage, who looked positively star-struck in response, as if her deepest and wildest dreams had come true.

"Oh my," Mirajane remarked, smiling knowingly as she watched Gray drunkenly lead the water mage out of the guild hall. "Should we stop them?"

Cana hiccuped in response and laughed. "Nah, let it happen. It had to eventually."

Mirajane giggled, glancing over the guild hall. The onlookers had mostly dissipated, and Levy, Jet, and Droy were currently trying to lift a passed out Gajeel while Lucy and Happy were still drawing on Natsu's face, his visible skin almost completely marked up in black ink now. "True." _Interesting._

Perhaps they should do drinking games like this more often…

…

 _ **Fin**_

 **A/N: For those who didn't notice, Natsu = Silly drunk, Gajeel = Friendly drunk, and Gray = Flirty drunk. Thanks for reading!**


End file.
